The Ultimate Guide to Sleeping in Hostels, Trains, and Other “Not-So-Cozy” Places

Table of Contents

1. The night I almost slept under a vending machine

2. Why “bad sleep” is basically a rite of passage

3. The gear that makes you feel (almost) human again

4. How to survive the hostel dorm circus

5. Tricks for sleeping on trains, buses, and every moving tin can

6. Dealing with jet lag, noise, and… snoring strangers

7. Keeping your stuff safe while you’re drooling in your sleep

8. Learning to laugh at it (because what else can you do?)

9. Final thoughts: Sleep is overrated—wait, no it’s not

1. The night I almost slept under a vending machine

Okay, full confession: I once fell asleep in an airport wedged between a vending machine and a trash can. I figured it was genius—free access to snacks and my own little wall to lean on. Except… the vending machine made this low humming noise that sounded like it was plotting to kill me, and some janitor woke me up at 3 a.m. with the classic, “You can’t sleep here.”

Have you ever hit that point on a trip where you’re just like, “I don’t care if it’s a pile of gravel, I’m lying down now”? Yeah. That’s how this guide was born.

2. Why “bad sleep” is basically a rite of passage

If you’ve never shared a bunk bed with six strangers while someone’s phone alarm goes off at 4 a.m. (and they don’t hear it for ten whole minutes), are you even traveling? Part of the whole “I’m discovering myself” vibe is also discovering that you can, in fact, survive on three hours of sleep and a questionable gas station coffee.

But let’s be real—long-term, sleep deprivation will chew you up and spit you out. You get cranky, make dumb decisions (like buying an inflatable flamingo at a train station—long story), and your immune system basically quits.

3. The gear that makes you feel (almost) human again

Look, I’m not saying stuff fixes everything, but having the right gear makes a difference. Here’s my not-so-consistent list:

1. Memory foam or inflatable travel pillow. Don’t fight me on this. Those weird bean-filled ones are a scam.

2. Good earplugs — because snoring is universal and somehow louder in hostels.

3. An eye mask — not the flimsy airline kind that feels like wet paper.

4. Sleeping bag liner — adds a layer between you and… mystery hostel sheets.

5. Portable white noise machine — okay, this one’s extra, but it saved my sanity in Madrid when my dorm was next to a salsa club.

Oh, and don’t get me started on people who don’t pack these things and then complain.

4. How to survive the hostel dorm circus

• Claim your space early. Bunk beds are like prison beds—first come, first serve.

• Curtain hack: I once duct-taped a sarong to the top bunk for “privacy.” (Looked ridiculous, worked great.)

• Talk to your roommates. Seriously. It’s harder for someone to steal your charger if you already know their name is Steve and he’s from Toronto.

• Bedbugs paranoia? Use your sleeping bag liner and do a quick mattress check with your phone flashlight. It’s awkward, but so is scratching bites for two weeks.

5. Tricks for sleeping on trains, buses, and every moving tin can

I love trains—until I’m trying to sleep in a seat designed by someone who clearly hates humans. Overnight buses? Don’t even get me started. But these help:

• Window seat = wall to lean on.

• Hoodie = instant pillow and light blocker.

• If you’re in a sleeper car, tie your bag to something (paranoid? Yes. Worth it? Also yes).

• On buses, wedge your feet against something so you don’t slide like a sad noodle when the driver brakes.

Once, my friend Jenna (not her real name because she’ll murder me) fell asleep on a train in Italy and woke up hugging a stranger’s coat. Zero regrets, apparently.

6. Dealing with jet lag, noise, and… snoring strangers

I wish I had some magical secret here, but honestly? You just sort of deal. Get daylight when you land, nap only if you’re dying, and drink water like it’s your job. For noise: earplugs + white noise + passive aggressive glare in the morning combo.

Also, quick PSA: if you’re the snorer, I still love you but I hate you too.

7. Keeping your stuff safe while you’re drooling in your sleep

Nothing ruins a nap like worrying your backpack’s about to grow legs. My low-tech tricks:

• Sleep with your bag straps looped around your arm or leg.

• Small valuables? Pillow them. Literally.

• On trains, I clip zippers together with a carabiner. Looks dumb, works great.

8. Learning to laugh at it (because what else can you do?)

One night in Prague, I ended up “sleeping” (read: staring at the ceiling) in a hostel dorm where someone practiced their recorder at midnight. Midnight! Who even owns a recorder past the age of 10?! At some point you just… embrace the chaos.

9. Final thoughts: Sleep is overrated—wait, no it’s not

Bad sleep makes good stories. And good gear makes bad sleep a little less, well, bad. If you take nothing else from this ramble: pack a proper pillow, claim your bunk early, and remember—it’s temporary.

What’s the worst place you’ve ever slept while traveling? (Bonus points if it’s weirder than “under a vending machine.”)

If you liked this rambling mess, maybe check out my other stuff? No pressure though.